journal 01. k e t o | d a y 4

I am such an obsessive person, the amount I have been reading, the number of podcasts I have been listening too... it's outstanding lol. This has been something I have wanted to do for a long time now, having my gf's do it helped push me over the edge.

As a super type A - prone to abnormal stress - kinda human, I have to be careful when I dive into something, especially with food. If I am not careful, and I dive in too deep too fast, in only leads to enormous amounts of stress - which then skyrockets my cortisol, fatigues my adrenals, bolsters my digestion, and leads to more inflammation and deeper damage.

Coming to this place has been a journey.

2013: the removal of gluten | dairy | egg; at the time I found out the state of my gut, and knew I needed drastic measures; I also know I was not mentally stable enough to dive deep into the thing I needed (candidiasis protocol), so I worked on the allergens (that was more than enough to focus on).

from the age of 28-32: intensive therapy focusing on the exit of an abusive relationship | rage | anger | the loss of my father; this was the darkest time of my life (or so I thought until 2017 hit) where I faced depression, anxiety, self-harm, suicidal thinking... it was dark.

2016: face alcoholism, cut booze + drugs out | begin to enlarge my spiritual practice

2017: my marriage ends - potentially the most shocking, heart-shattering event of my entire life; I dig deep to find god - deeper than I have ever dug. I focus hard on sobriety and surrender. Food goes on the back burner for the 1st time in my whole life - I'm too heartbroken to eat, and the removal of booze has me eating every ounce of (healthy) sugars (still sugar) I can get my hands on. But hey, raw desserts and piles of dates is better than booze and cocaine, so I count my lucky stars and keep focusing on my work.

2018: my periods are excruciating - I'm talking 12 naproxen in a day pain. I finally cave and see a doc. We do more IgG testing, as well as a bunch of blood work, I find out that I am not only still having issues with gluten, dairy, egg, but we can now add: peanut, soy, potato, cashew, brazil nuts, pistachio. Plus my iron levels are low, B12 is almost non-existent, and my histamine levels are dangerously high.

She suspects MTHFR.

It also looks like an autoimmune response.

My gut is definitely not doing well.

At this point I am now:

- refined sugar-free

- I consume only good quality meats

- I avoid pesticides

- no sweetener | additives | food colourings

- no grains

- no booze

- no drugs

- no allergens

At this point:

I am frustrated

At this point:

I am ready.

So here I am - day 4 of keto.

Today I knocked coffee out (why not, my head is already pounding like a mother fucker, although today feels like a "normal headache" not a migraine). I feel a little better today. I feel enormously inspired. I feel grateful for food and the miracle of the human body. I feel grateful for my Gram who taught me to be a good herb loving, health-obsessed, witch. And I feel grateful that I have a Mum who has just an elaborate witch cupboard as me. So, behind the headache, there is gratitude - a lot of it. And where I was having coffee, I made a matcha with cordyceps, XCT, vanilla, coconut butter - and I talked to the plants as I crafted.



1 scoop of Domo Pure Organic Matcha 

1 tablespoon MCT oil

 1 tablespoon coconut butter

1/2 tablespoon cordyceps 

a dash of vanilla 

blend all ingredients with hot water.